What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Why do I sweat between my legs all the time, top off my legs, all way down?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Senators get ready to roll out a new crypto bill - Politico

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Why do some people tell the girl I like that I don’t like her when I do like her?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Why is my ex trying to provoke an argument with me?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

New Webb Data Confirms ‘Crazy Idea’ About Cooling Effects of Pluto’s Haze - The Daily Galaxy

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

What role did China play in the signing of the "Beijing Declaration" between Fatah and Hamas? What other information is worth noting for talks among Palestinian factions in Beijing?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

How do I build rapport with anybody?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Why does my iPhone keep on saying I can’t upload photos to iCloud and say it doesn't have enough iCloud storage when it still has space?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

New COVID-19 variant detected in Washington state, health officials say - KING5.com

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why are people saying that Trump is fat when he is an athletic 6 foot 3 and 215 pounds?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …